Jalapeño Race

On Tuesday, Dean and I ventured into Long Street in Cape Town to dedicate our night to a single purpose and a great love: jalapeño poppers. For the poor souls who haven't tried these before (don't come to me with your dislike for spicy food or deep-fried stuff - geeet owwt), jalapeño poppers are pretty much chillis (or jalapeño peppers to get technical - the preference is to use them when they are dark green which is before they first go through a goth stage and then turn red)(the green colouring somehow gives more spice so I guess that's the reason for the preferene) filled with goats cheese or cream cheese usually (sometimes chefs use bacon, as the legend goes) and then deep-fried/flash-fried in a bready batter. Ie a heart attack ie a culinary wonder and delight. 

So we went along Long Street to the restaurants that serve poppers, as well as Rafikis up in Kloof Street to try them out. We also made our own categories to be really professional. Sauce was determined by how well it complimented the actual popper. Batter was the thickness and quality. Spice is self-explanatory (actually not really - our favourite level of spice is the level just below where you want to rip your tongue out - assertive yet doesn't mask the taste of the whole thing). Freshness is determined by how crunchy the actual pepper is - this is sientifically factual. And filling is similar to the sauce, but I guess also the thickness and quality of the batter, and how greasy it is. Here are the scores:

1. Mexican on Long

Sauce: 4/10
Batter: 6/10
Spice: 7/10
Freshness: 9/10
Filling: 7/10

Grand Total: 33/50

Comments: These ones were healthier tasting than our cornerstone poppers at Cubana as they weren't greasy at all. Original serving is three, but you can add how ever many more for R15 multiplied by x.

2. Sgt. Pepper

Sauce: 8/10
Batter: 8/10
Spice: 6 /10
Freshness: 6/10
Filling: 7/10

Grand Total: 35/50

Comments: These were small and solidly filled. It's probably quite important to acknowledge that the serving was two chilli poppers and then four peppadew poppers - these are less spicy and more sweet so this affected the spice rating. Also important to acknowledge - I regret not getting a pizza there. Not only did they smell good, they also had a cool way of displaying the different options and also had a two for one deal. Poo.

3. Sticky Fingers

(This was just off Long Street to be exact - one of the side roads)

Sauce: 9/10
Batter: 9/10
Spice: 9/10
Freshness: 8/10
Filling: 8/10

Grand Total: 43/50

Comments: They were perfectly greasy and the batter was optimum thickness (a teenage dream for me). Serving is one per person, obviously with relevant pricing.

4. Rafiki's

Sauce: 6/10
Batter: 7/10
Spice: 8/10
Freshness: 7/10
Filling: 8/10

Grand Total: 36/50

Comments: None. Besides for this annoying guy collecting change for charity who was so demeaning of my R4. 


So as it is obviously stated, Sticky Fingers was the champion of the evening*. Yet I enjoyed all of the restaurants we visited - each had it's own unique atmosphere and menu - and I encourage myself and others to eat out at the mentioned places (and also to try out others in the city. Go on an adventure young Bilbos). Pricing for each popper was very cheap (on average R12 per popper) so reliving our evening is a nifty way to predrink before more drinking. Also, we drank beer at each place. Black Label beats any beer, I don't care what you say.

*As mentioned in the second last sentence, the results of the scoring may or may not be tainted with the alcohol consumed that evening - we may or may not hage arrived at the right place at the right time in our intoxication. But I can't be sure. Try it out for yourself.